Generational Inflictions of Womanhood

Every woman is a type of woman. There are house wives, career woman, free spirited woman, focused woman, adventurous woman, irrelevant woman, societal woman, bitches, Hoes, Gold diggers, Prostitutes, and the list goes on. Then there are those who are in between all of these, or some of these. There are woman who like to spend their time in the kitchen making food, and those who simply don’t enjoy that. Others prefer to clean then to cook, while others love to do both. There are woman who like to bear kids, be soccer moms, and those who simply, don’t do kids. Then there is a status. Single woman, married woman, divorced woman, or widowed woman. And these my friend, are the unfortunate conformities that society puts on us as woman, boxing us into “how to be, or do” woman.

Growing up, I always thought I had to be all of them so that I could enjoy the pleasure of excelling at my career, while having a home life, but time and experience have shown me that it is quite impossible for me, my sanity, and the sanity of those around me that I even try do that to myself.  Depending on where and how you were raised, your culture and upbringing determine in their own way, the type of woman you will become because it is off course, how you were raised. It is the community in which you were raised so that you can survive or keep up with in that community.

But what happens when you don’t turn out the way your family had hoped you would? What happens when you don’t come out domesticated or as ambitious as they hoped you would. What happens when you aren’t the model daughter they had hoped would come out of this girl- raised by one era, for co-existence in another era?

These days there are all sorts of sexualities: Lesbian, Bi-sexual, Heterosexual, transgender, and all them have their own identity structure all together. These are woman who have lived or existed for a very long time, but have had to subdue themselves, deny themselves or not exist in them, so another person could exist for them.

 Culture plays an imperative role in who you become. But it is not only culture that determines the type of woman you become, It is your upbringing. It is what you saw growing up, it is how you learnt womanhood, It what you learnt about womanhood, it is what you were taught consciously and sub-consciously about womanhood. It is all about who taught you womanhood.

But you know what? I am not that kind of girl. Don’t you dare try to box me or fit me into a box that was not made for me.  A box that does not have my name on it, but you put it there so you know how to deal with me. Don’t you dare try to tell me who are I am, just so you are comfortable dealing with me. I hate stereotypes! I cant stand them. But the reality is that, if I don’t find a box to fit myself into, somebody, society to be exact, will do it for me, so here goes:

I am not that type of girl you think I am. I am the type of girl who thinks what she wants, when she wants and I will change my mind when I want.